ROYSTON VASEY NOTES AND NEWS  We can now reveal the latest from Master Li’s Shed. He has been working with the M.O.D on the Invisible Tank Project. Li first started with making sheep invisible when the Eco-Brigade complained that the sheep made the Moor look untidy and spoilt the look of the countryside . He later offered to make the Wind Farms invisible but the Eco- Brigade refused on the very reasonable grounds that without the windfarms ruining the countryside no one would take Climate Change seriously and that anyway as it was the white middle class that enjoyed the countryside and it was their fault their was Climate Change is served them jolly well right.  An earlier example of Master Li’s Work. There are over 300 invisible sheep in these fields.

ROYSTON VASEY NOTES AND NEWS
 We can now reveal the latest from Master Li’s Shed. He has been working with the M.O.D on the Invisible Tank Project. Li first started with making sheep invisible when the Eco-Brigade complained that the sheep made the Moor look untidy and spoilt the look of the countryside . He later offered to make the Wind Farms invisible but the Eco- Brigade refused on the very reasonable grounds that without the windfarms ruining the countryside no one would take Climate Change seriously and that anyway as it was the white middle class that enjoyed the countryside and it was their fault their was Climate Change is served them jolly well right.

An earlier example of Master Li’s Work. There are over 300 invisible sheep in these fields.
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ROYSTON VASEY NOTES AND NEWS
The residents of Sewer Lane, Royston Vasey were surprised to find a baby elephant eating the plants in their front gardens earlier this week. They are used to the ewes bringing their lambs down off the moor into their gardens but this is the first time one has brought an elephant. It is suspected that there may be a herd of feral elephants concealed on the wilder parts of the moor, and that the mysterious trumpetings complained about may NOT have been Bentleys Brewery Brass Band at rehearsal but lovelorn pachyderms up on the moor. Local sheepdog trainer Seth Pudephat says that he will need something larger than a Border Collie if he is to train Elephant Dogs and that the Shepherds crooks will have to be made out of high tensile steel. Thanks to our Pachydern Correspondent  Elledark

ROYSTON VASEY NOTES AND NEWS

The residents of Sewer Lane, Royston Vasey were surprised to find a baby elephant eating the plants in their front gardens earlier this week. They are used to the ewes bringing their lambs down off the moor into their gardens but this is the first time one has brought an elephant. It is suspected that there may be a herd of feral elephants concealed on the wilder parts of the moor, and that the mysterious trumpetings complained about may NOT have been Bentleys Brewery Brass Band at rehearsal but lovelorn pachyderms up on the moor. Local sheepdog trainer Seth Pudephat says that he will need something larger than a Border Collie if he is to train Elephant Dogs and that the Shepherds crooks will have to be made out of high tensile steel.
Thanks to our Pachydern Correspondent Elledark

 Royston Vasey Look Back. Once a familiar sight in Royston Vasey was Armitage Bridge and Nellie, the future Mrs Bridge. They went on this sidecar outfit to most of the Agricultural Shows in Yorkshire where Nellie won best Ewe on a number of occasions. After the wedding they emigrated to New Zealand where their maritial state was looked upon with more friendly eyes being a common set up in the remoter regions of that country.
Thanks To Tindink for picture

Royston Vasey Look Back.
Once a familiar sight in Royston Vasey was Armitage Bridge and Nellie, the future Mrs Bridge. They went on this sidecar outfit to most of the Agricultural Shows in Yorkshire where Nellie won best Ewe on a number of occasions. After the wedding they emigrated to New Zealand where their maritial state was looked upon with more friendly eyes being a common set up in the remoter regions of that country.

Thanks To Tindink for picture

ROYSTON VASEY NOTES AND NEWS
Penistone Sheep My father always said that Penistone was the coldest place in England, and that Penistone Station was the coldest place in Penistone. I’m not inclined to disagree with him, having shivered on the platform many a time. Even colder than the station though is Penistone Moor. By breeding from the sheep that were tough enough to survive a Penistone winter a particularly hardy sheep has evolved, The Penistone. When Skinner Normanton took his expedition to the South Pole in search of the ill fated Scott expedition he took along a small flock of Penistone sheep. During the day they hauled the sledges and at night they snuggled up with the crew keeping them warm. I think there was originally an intention to use them as food but when it came to it they just could not eat someone they had been snuggled up the previous night. All the sheep came back except poor Ogwen who fell into a deep crevasse . The sheep went back onto Penistone Moor though Skinner told my father “Poor little buggers wish they were back at South Pole, it were a sight warmer there”  A real tough Yorkshire breed

ROYSTON VASEY NOTES AND NEWS

Penistone Sheep
My father always said that Penistone was the coldest place in England, and that Penistone Station was the coldest place in Penistone. I’m not inclined to disagree with him, having shivered on the platform many a time. Even colder than the station though is Penistone Moor. By breeding from the sheep that were tough enough to survive a Penistone winter a particularly hardy sheep has evolved, The Penistone.
When Skinner Normanton took his expedition to the South Pole in search of the ill fated Scott expedition he took along a small flock of Penistone sheep. During the day they hauled the sledges and at night they snuggled up with the crew keeping them warm. I think there was originally an intention to use them as food but when it came to it they just could not eat someone they had been snuggled up the previous night. All the sheep came back except poor Ogwen who fell into a deep crevasse . The sheep went back onto Penistone Moor though Skinner told my father “Poor little buggers wish they were back at South Pole, it were a sight warmer there”
A real tough Yorkshire breed

ROYSTON VASEY NOTES AND NEWS
For Sale:-Genuine Moorland Bred Royston Vasey Pedigree Poodles
The Japanese have really taken to the Royston Vasey Poodle, the fact that they can be fed on grass and not expensive tinned kangaroo plays a part,but their quietness and docility makes them suitable for big city life.They are descended from the Dutch Schapendoes or sheep poodles that are used to herd sheep in the hills around Rotterdam.Numbers are limited. Madonna has just swapped ten of her orphans for just three RV poodles which she has named Laaarry,Baaarry and Haaarry, according to Hello Magazine. We are now able to offer one free African orphan with each poodle to Genuine Celebrities only.

ROYSTON VASEY NOTES AND NEWS

For Sale:-Genuine Moorland Bred Royston Vasey Pedigree Poodles

The Japanese have really taken to the Royston Vasey Poodle, the fact that they can be fed on grass and not expensive tinned kangaroo plays a part,but their quietness and docility makes them suitable for big city life.They are descended from the Dutch Schapendoes or sheep poodles that are used to herd sheep in the hills around Rotterdam.Numbers are limited. Madonna has just swapped ten of her orphans for just three RV poodles which she has named Laaarry,Baaarry and Haaarry, according to Hello Magazine.
We are now able to offer one free African orphan with each poodle to Genuine Celebrities only.