Well worth a read, especially if have Round Robin letters inflicted upon you at Christmas

Quote:-
 Concerning the holiday in Antigua, you see the person at the back of the group photo, in a big hat? You probably thought she was an innocent passer-by. Well, look closely… it’s me! Yes, I followed you to Antigua as I have followed you and your family everywhere for the past five years, as it happens, because I hate you, Caro Wilson, you smug cow. I hate you and I hate in particular the way you send these four-page full-colour Christmas letters to everybody as if you were the Queen. 
I enclose some book tokens for the girls (but only for satirical reasons), and an amusing volume called Adultery for Dummies for Tom, because I fear he hasn’t read it. Now, if you’re wondering what’s been happening to me all these years, it’s not an uninteresting story. In the autumn of 2006, I met a handsome and ambitious young man called Jason at Holistic Pilates and gave him a lift home. We became lovers instantly. 

After a six-month visit to Australia, we set up a surveillance business, which has been incredibly successful, with an office in Mayfair. We have 25 operatives, and have been retained by several Gulf states, but the best thing is: I’ve had your entire family under 24-hour intensive surveillance from the very start, just for the pleasure of establishing that your Christmas newsletters are full of complete and utter rubbish. 
Don’t bother trying to find the cameras and microphones; if Mossad can’t do it, I don’t suppose you can. Above all, Happy Christmas!
Lynne”
Lots more Click HERE

Well worth a read, especially if have Round Robin letters inflicted upon you at Christmas


Quote:-

  1. Concerning the holiday in Antigua, you see the person at the back of the group photo, in a big hat? You probably thought she was an innocent passer-by. Well, look closely… it’s me! Yes, I followed you to Antigua as I have followed you and your family everywhere for the past five years, as it happens, because I hate you, Caro Wilson, you smug cow. I hate you and I hate in particular the way you send these four-page full-colour Christmas letters to everybody as if you were the Queen.

I enclose some book tokens for the girls (but only for satirical reasons), and an amusing volume called Adultery for Dummies for Tom, because I fear he hasn’t read it. Now, if you’re wondering what’s been happening to me all these years, it’s not an uninteresting story. In the autumn of 2006, I met a handsome and ambitious young man called Jason at Holistic Pilates and gave him a lift home. We became lovers instantly.

After a six-month visit to Australia, we set up a surveillance business, which has been incredibly successful, with an office in Mayfair. We have 25 operatives, and have been retained by several Gulf states, but the best thing is: I’ve had your entire family under 24-hour intensive surveillance from the very start, just for the pleasure of establishing that your Christmas newsletters are full of complete and utter rubbish.

Don’t bother trying to find the cameras and microphones; if Mossad can’t do it, I don’t suppose you can. Above all, Happy Christmas!

Lynne”

Lots more Click HERE

austpicious

superlinguo:

A workmate of mine has a penchant for using the word pootle in conversation. Pootle is a great word. POOTLE. There it goes again.

As you may be able to tell, this word makes me laugh every time, a reaction which was only exaggerated by reading the Urban Dictionary entries…

Cloggy:- I’m more of a pootler myself though I do treat myself to a faff  from time to time.I remember a time when ‘beetle’ meant the same thing. I still remember being invited in very posh tones “Let’s all beetle along to the airfield”

annachronique

annachronique:

When I take a look at my Dashboard, everyone seems to love reading and culture so much, and it makes me so happy! Yet, any shoes or ‘pretty picture’ post will get twenty times as much reblogs/likes than a post that requires a little bit of mindwork: an informative text, a short poem, a socially critical comic strip…

I know it takes more time, but it’s so disproportionate that it gets me down.

What’s wrong Tumblr?

Found in “How to write badly well”

"Carol stands absolutely still. In front of her, not more than ten feet away, is a fully-grown black bear. The ferns beneath its feet are crumpled and slightly browning, their delicate fronds pressed into the thick, wet mud of the forest floor. Carol hesitates. Slowly, very slowly, she looks around for a possible escape route. The light falling through the canopy of leaves has a pale, thin quality to it and the air is brackish with a faint scent of the stagnant water from the nearby estuary.She decides to make a dash for it. Her shoes are slightly too tight, pinching at her toes and digging into the soft skin just above her heels. If she had put on thicker socks this morning, this wouldn’t be a problem, but in her haste to leave the house, she had grabbed a thin white cotton pair designed to sit low on the ankle, hidden below the line of the shoe. Seeing her move, the bear leaps forwards. A plane is flying directly overhead and the sound of its engines is like the rumble of a distant washing machine. It is a passenger plane of some sort – most probably an old 737 with a good few years of service still ahead of it. The bear eats Carol.”
I like it

Click HERE for more